Haiz.

I'm in such a dilemma.

Should I or Should not go to Taiwan?

Some say shld go as it's an experience, but then some juz told me it's a waste of time to go there. But it's so demn long lar. 34 days. And I go there is MAINLY to do "sai kang" lorz, as what my officer has told me. Right now I think I can ask one person to substitue me arz, since my chief clerk wants me to stay back in Singapore to help her. And from what I heard from those who had gone to Brunei last month, that Ah Boon eveyday also keep farking all the battalion HQ ppl. Wtf lar, until alot of ppl there so pissed off with him. So if I go there also 100% confirm everyday kana disturb by him 1. Haiz. so sucks lar.

ARGZ!!! I donno lar! Sure decide tml lar!

I was reading an article abt lasik surgery in Singapore a few days ago n I juz feel so TEMPTED to go for tt operation lar. Apparantly it costs typically between $3K to $4K bahz, for both eyes (I also donno y they wan to charge based on PER eye, which is dumb in my opinion). Okay lar, the price is reasonable I feel, at least it FREES u from wearing contact lens/glasses perm for the rest of ur life unless u get short-sighted again.

So I started searching the net for all the available clinics tt offer Lasik Surgery. HmM.. most r around the same price lar, so I juz hope tt I will be able to go for tt before I start uni in 2008. Maybe after I ORD but before sch starts. Although my parents have agreed to sponser me, but I think I shld also start saving some $$$ lar. Maybe I pay 1K to 2K and ask my parents to pay the remaining. But looking at my PATHETIC NS pay now, I think I can 4get abt saving tt much lar. Maybe shld faster go find a job when I ORD n save up. But haiz...it's still a LONG way to go till 2008. Sighz.

Wtf, for wat shit issue me 1 stupid pager. Kns. Just don't ever beep during weekend.

I was standing there next to the MRT door when I saw her enter and stand next to me.

Yes, I've not mistaken.

For that split second, my heart started beating real fast. I keep thinking what am I gonna to do.

After awhile, I feel that it's best that I just pretend nth has happened.

Having passed a few stops, while standing next to me, she turned around to look at me.

She turned back to the front, and suddenly turned again to look at a second time.

I guess she has seen me.

At that moment I feel warm as if I've just gotten sun-burn.

And like me, we pretend we didn't encounter at all.

That feeling sucks.

After 2 weeks working in 4SIR S1 Br, I would say that I'm really happy and satisfied with my current working environment. Everything is going smoothly. I can work with my superiors in my branch, and also the other servicemen in my branch. I don't know if it's cuz that damned *Ah Boon* is not around at the moment which makes life more peaceful. But whatever it is, I think I don't mind staying at S1 Br as a docu clerk till the day I ORD.

Although many politics still exist in this unit, especially in battalion HQ which involved that *Ah Boon* in causing the 4 different branches to fall out and leading the battalion towards self-destruction, I just hope that he get's transferred out ASAP next year. In fact, everyone in my branch seems quite united against this *Ah Boon*, which I think is the main factor that casued us to feel closer to each other. At this critical time whereby there's gonna be Audit check in Jan 2007, and the livelihood of my chief being at stake, all of us will try our best to do well for the assessment and not giving *Ah Boon* any chance to fault us.

I'm prepared to be treated as a 3rd or 4th class citizen in this camp. Like my chief said, our beloved *Ah Boon* hates clerks to the core and always push all the blame to the clerks when anything goes wrong. And I heard that this *Ah Boon* nearly wanted to charge my upper study in my branch, just because of a few MINOR mistakes like nv update the details in proficiency booklets properly. Ain't he insane? It's akin to a teacher saying that she wants to cane a student juz becuz a student nv does his homework. And I can't believe *Ah Boon* actually said to the R&D clerk that he wans to increase the CHARGE rate in my camp. It's like "HELLOOOOOOO!!", do u just so enjoy charging people or sending ppl to DB? Ain't he a SICKO? I believe so.

My chief warns me that I have to be mentally prepared if I stay in S1 Br, because *Ah Boon* enjoys coming to S1 Br almost everyday and start farking all the clerk, before he goes back to his office. And he doesn't seem to realise that we r "respecting" him because of his rank on his shoulder, and not because of who he really is.

I must learn to treasure life in 4SIR w/o *Ah Boon* around. Literally, all of us just feels so happy w/o HIM around.

Haiz. I'm still waiting for my death note to drop down from heaven, so that *Ah Boon* can have the greatest honour in me writing his name first in it.

Imagine u r watching TV halfway and suddenly someone from your camp calls to tell u that you've just gotten 3 EXTRAS. And thanks to some idiot who don't seem to understand simple English and can't even count properly.

THANKS to this person.

Well done.

Sometimes I really can't trust ppl with low intelligence level. Not that I'm saying mine is high or wat.

From today onwards I swear I shld juz give a "bo-chap" attitude. If any1 wanna complain abt my work attitude, so be it. I also don't give a farking damn.

Sometimes it's simply not worth ur effort contributing tt much. When all the trouble comes, u r still the one who get it. And all the credits go to those HIGHER up there. What a farked up system.

Totally enjoyed myself during the outing with my HQ platoon. The so-called "platoon cohesion day", whereby we are supposed to go some place and play. I got the chance to sit in my OC's car to Yishun SAFRA in the morning while the rest took public transport. Lolx... We played CS, bowling, and arcade for like 4 hours or so. And lunch at a western restaurant was a treat from my OC, same goes for the bowling. I think perhaps the most fun day of my life in 4SIR. If only we can more of such outings.... Okay, back to the lousy side. I just wan to curse these ppl.

This morning one F**KER officer only know how to kpkb till my armskote spec cried. What a blardy farker. Only know how to pin-point ALL the fault and start digging back old wounds. Knn... If he's not an officer I swear I sure whack him up and down. Farker, only know how to threaten us with LOTS of extras. CB, I cursed that u get lots of EXTRAS till ORD still cnt clear. What a pretence who know how to boot-lick in front of higher ranking officers. Kns.

And on Wednesday it was a MILITARY POLICE spot-check. Knn... I shan't say more, but some of my friends would know abt it. I would only blame it on my blardy BAD luck that has sticked to me ever since I entered the cursed land of 4SIR. Ever since this incident I juz feel so AWKWARD to even look at my CSM and OC. Haiz, I must have greatly disappointed them. Whatever it is, I juz take it as an lesson learnt and gladly accept my punishment (if there's any), although I know my angelic OC will sure try his best to cover my ass. Sometimes I juz feel so guilty that my OC treats me so so sooooooooooooo WELL and yet I give him lots of problems, be it armskote or the MP incident. I think I'm juz one big bastard trouble-maker. Haiz.

And some CCB armourers who only know how to complain how DIRTY weapons are. Nabei, I tolerate this particular armourer for a long time, so are the armskoteman of Alpha, Charlie and Support coy. Don't force us one day the 4 of u give u one good whacking then u can learn how to stop barking like a farking mad dog. If u wan complain anything juz go find my OC lar. Stop farking threaten me wat complain to my OC or CSM. U think I SCARED izzit!? U only work Mon to Fri, 8am to 5pm, then still wan to REQUEST ppl to stay back in a SUNDAY MORNING to clean arms!? Are u NUTS!? Why not u try BURNING ur weekends consecutively and see how that FEELS!?

And I think the 2 person mentioned above, both the officer and armourer seem to not understand the meaning of TEMPORARY armskoteman.

HELLO!!!!!!????????

I NEVER EVEN ATTEND ANY ARMSKOTE COURSE AND MY ARMSKOTE SPECS ARE EVER SO BUSY TO TEACH ME ANYTHING....

PLEASE DON'T ASSUME I KNOW EVERYTHING OKAY!?

IF I KNOW EVERYTHING THEN MIGHT AS WELL ASK SAF TO ABOLISH THE ARMSKOTE COURSE!?

*Phew........* Feel so shuang after cursing these ppl. I juz hope that the both of them can get KNOCKED down by car and DIE!!!!

I think next time when I'm on OFF or watz I shld juz switch off my HP so that NO ONE will call n bother me. This morning I received 5 missed calls from my unit and when I call back, no1 actually confessed in calling my HP. Fine.

And juz a few mins ago, some i-dot called me again.

Armourer: Hi, can u open the armskote room now? I'm coming over.
Me: Huh? Who r u?
Armourer: Armourer.
Me: Sorry arz, I'm on OFF now, go call my armskote spec if u wan. BYE!!!

And subsequently hung up my phone.

Last night I was blog-surfing again, and I happened to chance upon some of the blogs of juniors who were ex-haisians and of course those even more junior that r still in haising. And from 12am till abt 3am, while reading some of the random blogs of these ppl, I started recollecting my sec sch days. The fun that I had with my sec sch friends, from sec1 all the way to sec4.

Then I started thinking of some of the "nicknames" that we gave teachers like "kang-kong" and "black hitler". How some ppl like to imitate my Emaths/Amaths teacher's high-pitch voice. About my "lightningS and thunderS". I missed the days when we will stay back after sch to do all the decos for the noticeboard at the back of the class. And I think up to now I still dislike the phy lessons and teacher. And I know during then I was basically CRAZED over my beloved BoA until some of my friends are tired of me saying BoA every now and then. I will never 4get the event when SQ or darrell or was it Denzil who kicked the empty bottle down from the 4th level right down to the 1st level outside HOD and was caught by tt "mo-peng" Colin Ting and Maths HOD. And to think that they seem to be LAUGHING even more when they were being scolded. I think tt's loose nuts arz. Then talking abt scolding, I will not 4get tt "tooT" NG TIAK KEE who's like so kpkb, name tag majiam everyday need to check like tt.

And guessed wat? I suddenly remember I actually have the 2003 graduation CD!! So I started spending roughly 10min searching my whole room for tt CD b4 I finally found it. Phew, luckily I didn't lose it. And while I was watching the 32min video, all the sweet old memories juz keep coming back lar. I seriously miss my sec sch days! Although it's been like 3 years only, but then it seems like a long time has passed. Those happy moments seem so distant in my mind, as I try to recall everything I could of my sec sch days.

But before I realised, I'm kinda zapped back into reality and to admit the fact that I'm now serving the farking army and I simply HATE and DREAD going BACK to tt cursed camp. I'm so sick and tired of army life.

JC life was disaster.
Army life was EVEN MORE disaster.
What's next? To be frank, I don't really look forward to Uni life either, unlike some of my friends who r in army now who actually look forward to this next phase of life after ORD for them.

Me?

Partly maybe cuz I've heard from friends in Accoutancy/Business course in NTU abt how disaster the modules they r taking can be. And the fact that I'm the stupidest compared to them make me feel that I'm NOT gonna make it and confirm do much worst as compared to them. I'm juz a stupid ass I feel.

Most importantly I juz hope to slack, slack and nua and slack and nua.... Until I *shuang*, but when will I get to do tt? After ORD? Haiz, tt's like 15 months to go. I juz wish to go overseas now for some break or watz, but then the STUPID army leave system is so corked up until I donno how it works.

But one thing for sure. I'm so looking forward to the end of 2006 and start of 2007.

Currently on my OFF for today and tml which my darn unit owes me. So my OC has officially told me that he has put my name up for POSTING OUT of this camp... YES!! U didn't c wrongly, I hope I'm getting OUT of this camp SOON!

And I donno wat the FARK those S2 branch ppl r. They seem to enjoy asking LOTS of questions majiam they r like interrogating sum1. Fark, if they r not officers I swear I sure ask them to STFU. And it seems currently my name is in the process of being taken OUT of the Brunei trip. Phew, thankfully I don have to go to Brunei and feed the mozzies my blood.

ARGZ!! I SERIOUSLY CAN'T WAIT TO GET POSTED OUT OF THAT CAMP AND GO SOMEHWERE ELSE!!!!

Sometimes I really wonder why am I wasting my off days juz like that? Lazing at home n rotting, and b4 I realise, it's BACK to camp. Gosh. How sucks can this vicious cycle be? And I juz remember today's my 7th month anniversary is ARMY. Wtf, I still have 15 months to go. Haiz, that's like 66% of the way to go!

Haiz, sianz sianz sianz!!!!

Holding on to that LAST glimpse of hope..... I shall endure!

Come!! Whack me with all the farking armskote stuff! So what if it's only 3 to 4 hours of sleep a day!? As long don't faint can already! Hurry up and give all the "sai kang" to do!! The enthu "sai kang" warrior!!

BUT if I'm NOT gonna get the fark out of tt stupid camp....................................................

I think I can go fark spider liaoz.

SighZ

IT'S BoA's 20th BIRTHDAY!!!

ARZZZZZZ!!!!!

I FEEL SO HIGH NOW!!

Ok...I'm mad.

Fark. Am I jinx or watz? Why when smth good has happened, some fark suay thing juz has to take place next? Fark fark fark!!

Sianz. End of the 5 days break liaoz. Gonna get confined this coming sunday for some stupid 'live' firing. Haiz.
On Saturday went ngee ann city kinokuniya book store to find some books on elementary Japanese. I'm such a kuku. Only manage to find it after like 30min like tt, and best thing is it's actually right at the entrance from where I enter. Fantastic arz. Bought 2 books which cost me$30. Okay arz, i think it's reasonable arz, compared to going for jap courses which can cost around $200.
Then yesterday I spent another $60 on a PC game: Heroes of Might and Magic V. Wah kaoz, I spend nearly 10 hours playing it yesterday lorz. From 3pm to7pm and then 8pm to 2am. Play until shiok. In total I think I spend $150 or so during this long weekend arz. Feel so SHUANG. I donno why, I don feel heartpain at all, but instead think it's necessary to "pamper" myself once awhile.
In the past when I'm still schooling, I might think twice when I buy smth, but then donno y ever since come into army I juz spend w/o thinking 1. Somemore I'm juz getting a PATHETIC $450 a month. Haiz. But whatever arz, now I'm juz so looking forward to the next public holiday, which is CHRISTMAS!?That's like 2 months from now. Sianz sianz sianz! And those ppl in my camp will keep saying "ORD ORD ORD ORD>....." Wtf lorz, ORD then ORD lar. Like tt keep saying can make ppl feel so jealous 1 arz. Haiz, nvm, but I think 1 yr from now I will also be in the "ORD" mood lar. But it's still a long way to go. Haiz, clear 2006 1st then talk.

So fun!!

So I am currently in NBS comp lab using MSN... And b4 that I went to crash my friend's course, AB105 lecture from 230pm to 430pm. My gosh, the lecture is SO boring lar! I yawned like donno how many zillion times. But understadable, as the module is wat organisation behaviour, which I feel in my opinion is quite a stupid n dumb module. Anyway, then pretending to help my friend carry her statistics textbook n walking around as if I'm a student there. Hahaz.. and b4 the lecture I went to the library to explore around..the lee wee nam library... but then I find it quite small arz as compared to what I initially expected.

So after the lecture went to visit my friend's friend's hostel, to see how "big" the hostel room is. Also quite disappointes that NTU hostels are quite small as compared to NUS ones. Hmm.. Somemore NTU only allow double bedrooms for year1s.. piangz... so sucks lorz.

From what I know business/acct students will need to do LOTs of projects. My gosh, that's so sucks arz. I prefer working alone. Haiz, but thinking again, next time go out work also need to work with other ppl. So that's y we need to learn "Organization behaviour" which teaches u how abt HR skills.

Now waiting for my friend to discuss finish her project then can go back liaoz. Lolx.. To certain extent living in hostel is like living in army camps. U see alot of ppl carry their "barang barang" as it's FRIDAY and every1's going home. Hmm... I would say it's an interesting experience today at NBS!

So here I am, on my off for tml, and 2 days of weekend, and deepavali off on Monday, then hari raya holiday on Tuesday. Arz... It's been LONG since I enjoy such a long break.

After tolerating some of the nonsense for a period of time, I talked to my OC abt it, and surprisingly, he's so understanding! Phew... Seriously, sometimes it's becuz of commanders like my OC, for example, that makes life in NS memorable, And pls, I don mean it in a sarcastic way. He's one commander that really knows how to earn not only my respect, but also every single other ppl's respect. If not for the CORKED-UP system in 4SIR, I think personally I won't mind slogging my life for someone like my OC. And I think I will give my 101% if required, as at least I know he appreciates wat I've done. On the other hand, some commanders r such BIG time losers. Kaoz, sometimes I wonder if their degenerative brain is malfunctioning or watz. which can't seem to understanding y so many ppl loathe them.

Seriously, I feel that be it in NS or outside NS, if someone (commander/leader) wanna fark someone, maybe the person shld really think thru in the 1st place whether it's their LOUSY guidance that cause the followers to do or react the wrong way? For example, how can a teacher have the cheek to scold a student if the teacher doesn't even know how to perform his duties well?

But on a lighter note, I'm surprised that quite a few commanders in my company will be going to NBS (Nanyang Business School) next year to take Business or Accountancy. Ok, my so-called future "seniors-to-be". Nice bunch of ppl to mix around with. And of course one PC in my coy who graduated from NTU business, who's ever so nice and say if I next time in uni need any help I may juz find him.

Deep down from the bottom of my heart, such commanders are SO SO HARD to get by. Sometimes I wonder if it's a blessing in disguise to be posted then to Bravo coy of 4SIR. Yes, my coy is okay, but the unit's policies n stuff simply turn me off. Haiz. But thinking thru, I feel that I really need a change of environment. Now I can ony leave my fate to the hands of those twinny-pea brain HQ ppl liaoz.

Being an armskote man.. SUCKS to the core! Fucking piece of shit.... Any idea what does being armskote man means>?

1) Waking up the the EARLIEST and sleeping the LATEST because u have to get ready all the stuff when they wan draw items and start arranging back the items when they return.

2) Getting farked for no apparant reason such as DIRTY sign in/out books cause of the OILY-stainted hands of the soldiers when they sign on the books.

3) And farking hell, some idiots, which include commanders who ALWAYS seem to 4get to sign out, and I've to spend time and energy gathering them back to sign.

4) You will be farking irritated when u r the ONLY one in the armskote room when they draw items, and those SHITHEAD assitants wanna slack and don wan to help u to give the weapon. Fucks, so ALMOST every second, ppl will be shouting at u to hurry up and get them the items they wan, and at the same time ensuring these IDIOTs don't sign at the wrong row, which they seem to ENJOY doing it most of the time.

5) And this one is for SURE!! U will get HEART ATTACK and HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE easily. Imagine when some IDIOTS forget to return items like bayonet or magazines, u will be spending an hour or so COUNTING over and over again, but the figures don't telly. Then when u ask the whole company again, these idiots will be like "O... paisehz.. i 4get to return!" Wtf.... I have a very STRONG feeling that very soon, I'm either gonna get EXTRAs or SOLs or worse still, go to DB!!!

And I donno wat's the farking problem with those pea-brain idiots higher up there doing. Do they actually understand wat is "proper management of manpower"? How could they have like wat 4 ADMIN clerks, 3 STOREMANs and 1 BLARDY armskoteman? Seriously, there shldn't be too many admin clerks, cuz seriously I think at the most 2 is MORE THAN ENOUGH lar!

But I'm not going to voice all that out. I shld just first wait until 27th Oct to know my NEW pes status, then from there I will speak to my OC, S1 and the chief clerk to POST me OUT!!!! So I think now I shld be gathering 101 reasons so why they have to post me out. If everything fails, then maybe I've got to ask "external agencies" for help.

I seriously donno wat the FARK is the problem with the highper authority ppl UP there doing. Fark. I seriously can't stand my unit. Can u imagine when the CO OPENLY DECLARES that he DESPISED ppl with medical problems and will treat them as 2nd class soldiers? Farking piece of shit. And he seems to ENJOY spreading the propaganda to the WHOLE unit, all the way down to the lowest lifeform of men. How would u feel if ppl sometimes give u that "look", as u r juz some farking piece of shit that's worse than those blangadesh workers out there.

I don't know if they r waiting for CHRISTMAS or r they juz feigning ignorance by 4getting to post me out. I DIE DIE will try to get the fark out of tt fark place.

Sometimes I really wonder if I'm cursed or wat. Always getting all the suay shits.

I feel good...
Te ne ne ne ne ne ne....
I knew that I would...
I feel good....
Te ne ne ne ne ne ne...
I knew I would...
So good... so GOOD!

When I know how things r gonna work out for me from now till I get *toot*, I just feel so happy lar. It's just wait, rot, wait, rot, and then *poof*. So now I shall be a good soldier and give my very best in watever work I'm supposed to do.

Now I believe in one thing. Birthday wishes do come true afterall! =)

Some commanders r juz so disgusting. One can actually say: "O...do u know why I give u all so much work to do, whereas ppl from other company r more slack than u? There's a reason behind this. Am I right to say that last time when u all were still schooling, ur teachers give u all lots of homework so that u all can do well in exams? The same thing applies here! I'm giving u all lots of work to do so that u all will be more skillful next time when u all ORD."

It's something along those lines.

WAH LAOZ! KAOZ! PLS LORZ! DON'T MAKE ME PUKE LAR. WE DO ALL THE WORK THEN U R ALWAYS WATCHING TV IN THE MESS, IF NOT U R SLEEPING IN UR OFFICE SLEEPING IN THE DAY! WAN TO SLACK JUST SAY SO LAR! IT'S NOT AS WE R SO NAIVE THAT WE WILL BELIEVE WAT U SAY LAR. BLARDY HELL.... SIMPLY "NATO".

**NATO = NO ACTION, TALK ONLY.

And I realised smth. Some ppl arz, I think the 3SG or the 2SG, when they do COS, they think they r really (COS = Chief of Singapore), and if u r a blardy PTE doing COS, ppl will treat u as (COS = Company's Only Slave).

Fark lar. Some commanders really really wanna make me PUKE lar. Er xin to the max. Pieces of shit. They make themselves as if they r angels when in actual fact they r juz so shitty.

Nvm, I swear I will get out of tt farking place. They think they can do me in!? No way!!

So I'm down with 6 COS duties for the month of Sep. Haiz. Okay, I must say I think I'm quite used to doing COS already, since I've already done so many. And I think right now I'm better at using the microsoft and the programming. Actually some of these things r simple but juz tt I'm such a comp-i-diot that I've to learn all these SIMPLE stuff.

I think this month will be quite peaceful as 99% of the ppl will be busy going to Changi Airport EVERYDAY to be luggage-porters and hence, me being not involved, hopefully can slack abit.

And this morning I nearly fainted during flag-raising. Thanks to my CSM who has done a good job by asking him to accompany him to TALK COCK becuz he couldn't sleep. N so we ended up from 12+am "talking" all the way till 4am b4 he says he wanna sleep. N throughout tt period he was doing ALL the talking, abt his life stories and moral values n I will be like nodding my head saying "Hmm.. yeah yeah.. ya..ya" So he was mentioning abt how "some commanders" who appeared to be friendly on the outiside r actually very scheming. Wow.. I was rather shocked y on earth will he tell me such thing. But wellz, it's true lar. This is a "dog-bite-dog" world, u will get eliminated if u r the weakest link.

And today n tml I'm being FORCED to apply my precious leave. Fark. That means end of the yr I can only apply lesser no. of days of leave.

So now I shall hopefully "enjoy" life while I can, although I seriously doubt any1 can really enjoy in such a god-damn camp.